Thursday, September 11, 2014
Just a side note.
I am a Christian. I believe whole heartedly in Jesus and His dying and being resurrected and saving my sorry self from hell. I really do. In the past year since DDAy, I have started to cuss like a sailor. I'm not proud of it. But it is something I do. Too much. I am sorry if those two facts together offend you. Really. I know I shouldn't use the language I do these days. It honestly feels therapeutic to me. And I am all about therapeutic. And to be honest, there are just not better words to describe life right now. When I say them, they are not empty.....if that counts for anything. I will try to work on it and praise Jesus (really) for covering this sin for me. Please show me the same grace. And don't be offended. I'm trying to heal. Really....
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2 comments:
If it makes you feel any better, I am a Christian too. The affair has also made me curse like a mad bandit. I call it my Infidelity Tourettes. I'm not proud of that, and it has lessened quite a bit. I believe God knows my heart. He knows my pain. He knows who I am inside and who I am not. I have given myself permission to do what I need to do in order to heal and follow my own timeline. My husband has been completely shocked at times and has chastised me for my foul mouth. I usually tell him that his whore cursed quite a bit and i never heard him complain about HER. "Gee honey, I thought you LIKED potty-mouthed women! No? Not when they are your wife? OH OK, only when they are your WHORE. Got it. So glad we straightened up that confusion!"
That usually causes him to back away in shock and horror, thus preventing a full on fight, so it's all good. Really. Oh and if you liked my names for the whore, you will love what I say in place of referring to him "effing" her, because the F word "OFFENDS HIM". Poor sensitive Dear. So now I say things like,
When you were tipping your cow. OR When you were riding the
whorey-go-round.
Feel free to block me if you need to, ha ha ha.
Absolutely love you!!! No blocking here!!
I didn't think anyone actually ever read my blog! So excited for comments. I AM NOT ALONE :)
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